When or where have you seen someone stand up against indignity or wrongful judgment in a way that was inspiring?
Fitting
We spend enormous energy trying to earn approval, whether growing for it, shrinking for it, or reshaping ourselves to get it - and communities spend enormous energy dispensing it, withholding it, or using it as a control mechanism. But approval is a diminishing game: it reduces people to auditioners and communities to panels of judges. Let's make the case for something better and truer, which we'll call "fitting." Fitting is cooperative. It assumes that both the person and the community bring something real to the encounter, and that the goal is a genuine match that honors who someone actually is while taking seriously what a community actually needs. You were not made to audition. You were made to fit. And when fit is found, something in both you and the community becomes more fully itself.
Now that you've answered the Icebreaker, here's another question - this one, about puzzle pieces.
Hopefully that makes enough sense to get you started. As you continue into the Worship portion of the Spotlight, pray this prayer together:
Lord,
When we are tempted to treat others as assets
instead of as human beings needing belonging,
designed by you to work together for good,
and accepted by grace no matter the results,
show us a better way.
Increase our love for you
and our love for one another.
Amen.
Lord,
When we are tempted to treat others as assets
instead of as human beings needing belonging,
designed by you to work together for good,
and accepted by grace no matter the results,
show us a better way.
Increase our love for you
and our love for one another.
Amen.
Reflect on "fitting" using the poem "As Kingfishers Catch Fire."
Read these words from Romans 12 (The Message translation)
Leader: Take your everyday, ordinary life — your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life —
All: And place it before God as an offering.
Leader: Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking.
All: Fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out.
Leader: Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity —
All: God brings the best out of you. God develops well-formed maturity in you.
Leader: The only accurate way to understand ourselves is by what God is and by what he does for us —
All: Not by what we are and what we do for him.
Leader: Each part gets its meaning from the body as a whole, not the other way around.
All: Each of us finds our meaning and function as a part of his body.
Leader: So since we find ourselves fashioned into excellently formed and marvelously functioning parts —
All: Let's just go ahead and be what we were made to be.
Leader: Without enviously or pridefully comparing ourselves with each other.
All: Without trying to be something we aren't.
Leader: If you preach, just preach. If you help, just help. If you teach, stick to your teaching.
All: If you give, give. If you lead, lead. If you serve, serve.
Leader: Love from the center of who you are.
All: Don't fake it.
Leader: Be good friends who love deeply.
All: Practice playing second fiddle.
Leader: Don't burn out. Keep yourselves fueled and aflame.
All: Be alert servants of the Master, cheerfully expectant.
Don't quit in hard times. Help needy Christians. Be inventive in hospitality.
Leader: Take your everyday, ordinary life — your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life —
All: And place it before God as an offering.
Leader: Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking.
All: Fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out.
Leader: Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity —
All: God brings the best out of you. God develops well-formed maturity in you.
Leader: The only accurate way to understand ourselves is by what God is and by what he does for us —
All: Not by what we are and what we do for him.
Leader: Each part gets its meaning from the body as a whole, not the other way around.
All: Each of us finds our meaning and function as a part of his body.
Leader: So since we find ourselves fashioned into excellently formed and marvelously functioning parts —
All: Let's just go ahead and be what we were made to be.
Leader: Without enviously or pridefully comparing ourselves with each other.
All: Without trying to be something we aren't.
Leader: If you preach, just preach. If you help, just help. If you teach, stick to your teaching.
All: If you give, give. If you lead, lead. If you serve, serve.
Leader: Love from the center of who you are.
All: Don't fake it.
Leader: Be good friends who love deeply.
All: Practice playing second fiddle.
Leader: Don't burn out. Keep yourselves fueled and aflame.
All: Be alert servants of the Master, cheerfully expectant.
Don't quit in hard times. Help needy Christians. Be inventive in hospitality.
Each Belongs to All the Others
Romans 12:3-8
3 For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you. 4 For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, 5 so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. 6 We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your faith; 7 if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; 8 if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead, do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.
3 For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you. 4 For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, 5 so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. 6 We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your faith; 7 if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; 8 if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead, do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.
This section uses the formula, "if it is _________, then __________ [adverb modifier]."
How many of these can you come up with in 5 minutes? Have one group member write them down. Feel free to divide and conquer if that helps!
How many of these can you come up with in 5 minutes? Have one group member write them down. Feel free to divide and conquer if that helps!
Now that you've done that, discuss two things:
- Sometimes this idea of having "gifts" is boiled down to very practical purposes, and it misses the potential of finding something like belonging or "fit" with others in a way that satisfies even more than a job well done would satisfy. Where have you seen this go poorly, and how can people guard themselves from this unfortunate pull?
- How might this idea of collaborating, fitting, and leaning into your personal gifts even as you find belonging in a community be a useful way for the church to be more valuable to people?
Finding Fit
For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you. | Romans 12:3
What would it look like if you truly needed to find your fit in Seattle?
Not "what could you do if you got around to it."
Not "what sounds vaguely interesting."
But what would it look like if you needed (the way you need a job when the rent is due.)
What if finding the ways you are uniquely suited to serve this city was actually urgent?
Take a few minutes with these questions. Write as much or as little as you want, but try to be specific. Generic answers won't help you here.
START WITH WHAT YOU ALREADY KNOW ABOUT YOURSELF
What do you do well (that doesn't feel like work to you) that others seem to find hard but comes naturally to you?
What kinds of people do you find yourself drawn to, noticing, or thinking about when you move through the city?
What problem in Seattle makes you angry, sad, or restless in a way that won't quite leave you alone?
NOW LOOK OUTWARD
If you had to walk out the door today and find one neighborhood, organization, or pocket of need in Seattle where those things overlap, where would you go first?
Who do you already know who is doing work in this city that you respect? Could you call them this week and ask if you could buy them coffee and listen?
THE FIRST THREE STEPS
If you needed to start today, what would step one actually be?
Not a category. A specific action.
Step 1 - Probably internal:
Step 2 (once step 1 is done):
Step 3:
ONE LAST QUESTION
What has been stopping you from taking step one until now? Name it honestly.
Not "what could you do if you got around to it."
Not "what sounds vaguely interesting."
But what would it look like if you needed (the way you need a job when the rent is due.)
What if finding the ways you are uniquely suited to serve this city was actually urgent?
Take a few minutes with these questions. Write as much or as little as you want, but try to be specific. Generic answers won't help you here.
START WITH WHAT YOU ALREADY KNOW ABOUT YOURSELF
What do you do well (that doesn't feel like work to you) that others seem to find hard but comes naturally to you?
What kinds of people do you find yourself drawn to, noticing, or thinking about when you move through the city?
What problem in Seattle makes you angry, sad, or restless in a way that won't quite leave you alone?
NOW LOOK OUTWARD
If you had to walk out the door today and find one neighborhood, organization, or pocket of need in Seattle where those things overlap, where would you go first?
Who do you already know who is doing work in this city that you respect? Could you call them this week and ask if you could buy them coffee and listen?
THE FIRST THREE STEPS
If you needed to start today, what would step one actually be?
Not a category. A specific action.
Step 1 - Probably internal:
Step 2 (once step 1 is done):
Step 3:
ONE LAST QUESTION
What has been stopping you from taking step one until now? Name it honestly.
You were not made to audition. You were made to fit. The city needs what you specifically bring. This is not a pep talk, it's a theological point. Act like it's true!
Pray Together
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